The thing about expectations is that, they just sort of creep up behind you.
Each night I lie awake
Struggling to fall asleep
To physical pains, I am immune
‘Tis the struggle of time, that keeps me up.
With no clear sign
And nothing in sight
How long do I wait?
My impatience cracks through my facade
I try harder to not budge
Thoughts force their way to my conscious
Shattering the translucency of my being
How much longer do I stand here?
How much do I bear?
How far do I have to tread on this path?
How much should I pretend?
My patience wears thin
Exposing my fault lines
Weakening their immune
Dropping the curtains.
How long do I wait?
Whether I stuffed my face or not,
Whether I had visible collarbones or not,
Whether I weighed 99 lbs or a 154,
Whether I fit into a size 26 jeans or a 32,
I have been called fat ALL MY LIFE.
And I’m tired of it.
What business do people have telling me I’m overweight?
Keep your opinions and your advice to yourself.
“Use the stairs.” I actually prefer the elevator.
“Don’t eat too much.” I actually LOVE food.
“Workout.” I like lazing around, tbh.
“Lose a little weight.” WHY, BISH? *stuffs a burger*
Unless my weight is affecting my health, I REALLY don’t give a rat’s ass if I’m not your version of skinny.
And stop trying to be polite and calling us “healthy”, we all know you think we’re fat.
And this isn’t even the worst thing. The worst thing is when they tell you that you should lose weight because, HELLO, RISHTAS!
Like, really? REALLY?
Fuck you, for asking me to change myself for a boy who I don’t even know.
And fuck the rishtewaale, for wanting to get their dumb ass of a son a mannequin instead of an actual human.
If a person does not want to be with me because I don’t have the physique of a Barbie doll (let’s put aside the fact that he ain’t no Ken either), I feel sorry for him. And the chick who will end up being with him in the end.
Our society’s “standards” for brides (AND grooms too, but that’s a different debate altogether) is rather nauseating.
Back to the weight issue-
Shame on you, parents, for asking your daughters to lose weight for the sole purpose of finding her a groom.
Shame on you, society, for brainwashing her parents into believing that the only way you’ll get a good rishta is if you fit into a XS shirt.
Shame on you, boys, for wanting to fulfill your dream of being a modelizer, when sadly, none of you look like Adam Levine or Leonardo Di Caprio yourselves.
And shame on you, girls, for falling prey to such deviousness, and hating yourselves just cuz of what you see on TV.
I’m not saying you should love yourself- I shouldn’t have to tell you that in the first place.
But if you want to lose weight, DO IT FOR YOURSELF, DO IT TO MAKE YOURSELF HAPPY.
The numbers on the scale do NOT define you. And they NEVER WILL.
Be happy with yourself.
Be proud of who you are.
Because there may be many size zeroes out there, but there’s ONLY one you.
Overweight for you, but perfect for herself. xx
That one particularly frosty winter night,
While she was sitting in the cold, phone pressed to her ear,
The words that came over the other line,
Were supremely bitter, even for her.
Sure. She had heard literally worse before.
But nothing like this.
Only because she chose to speak her mind.
Only because she didn’t want to be away any longer.
Biting her tongue, and swallowing hard,
She kept quite, not wanting to sound hurt.
It’s a different thing, entirely.
You don’t expect to feel this way, you know?
Makes your insides churn- the hurt.
The psychological wounds morph into physical.
They hurt her heart. Her mind, more so.
In under sixty seconds, the distance, only geographical before,
Progressed to an emotional one.
What was only a matter of time,
Became a question mark for the future.
Hey you guys! I’ve got some news! 😀
So basically, my elder sister had persuaded me to check out this page on Facebook called “The Anonymous Writer“. Of course I did, and as it turns out, it was a page dedicated to writers- both their own and guest.
Intrigued by the feed, I decided to send in a fictional story of my own, which, to my surprise, HAS BEEN PUBLISHED! Al7mdulillah! 😀
I’m super excited to share this with you guys since you are the people who push me to be better, by being inspirations for my write ups. So thank you!
And of course a HUGE shoutout to my sister, who believed in me, and the editor at TAW for accepting my article! Yay!
If you wish to read the post, you can do so here!
This post has also been previously published in my WordPress, so if you’re feeling lazy, here’s the link to my WordPress post! 😀
Thankyou so much for finding the time! I love you all! xxxxx
(lol i sound like an award winner or sth. Probably cuz of the Golden Globe hangover.)